In chapters entitled 'The Hell of Healthy Food', 'Why you Shouldn't Diet', 'The Light-hearted Side of Weight', 'Daft Diets', and 'Food Philosophy', Aubrey Malone has collected a hilarious compendium of witticisms on the greatness of grub, from thought-provoking reflections to laugh-out-loud observations. This handy, pocket-sized book is a must-have for all those guilty epicureans and gorging gourmets wanting some food for thought.

No self-respecting dog owner should be without a copy of this book of quotations about man's best friend. Compiled by dog lover Aubrey Malone, The Little Book of Dog Quotes brings together hundreds of quips and quotes about canines. Actors, writers, politicians - even Sigmund Freud - all famously share an appreciation for those faithful friends who have left a lasting impression not just on our lives, but on our language and laughterlevels too. This collection of quotes is humorously illustrated by the cartoonist Richard Jolley. If you and your best friend want a good laugh, this irresistible little book is just what you need. A dog wags its tail with its heart. Martin Buxbaum A Canadian psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog's IQ. Here's how it works. If you spend $12 on the video, your dog is smarter than you are. Jay Leno What's the difference between a dog and a cat? Dogs have owners. Cats have staff. Fay Weldon If a film of mine wasn't going well I always put a dog into it. It worked every time. Walt Disney

Hilarious travel quotes covering everything from parking tickets to the ash cloud"" ""The average airplane is 16 years old. And so is the average airplane meal." --Joan Rivers""" ""I always sit at the back of a plane. You never hear of a plane backing into a mountain." --Tommy Cooper" For those who suffer road rage, agoraphobia, vertigo, and frustration at being kept waiting at ports, airports, taxi stands, train stations, bus stops, and so on, here is a chance to both relieve the agony and laugh out loud. This hilarious compendium of witticisms will be savored by hardened travelers, from thought-provoking brief sketches to laugh-out-loud observations on the muted joys of getting from A to B--or NOT getting there, as the case may be Illustrated with funny cartoons, this handy pocket-sized book is a must-have for any traveler or transportation enthusiast.

Aubrey Malone was born in Ballina and lived there until his father, the well-known solicitor Hugh Dillon-Malone, retired in 1969 and the family moved to Dublin. Ballina Stories and Poems is a mixture of fact and fiction in which he reminisces on the people and places he encountered during his formative years.

Many wise words are spoken in jest but many more stupid ones are said in earnest, as this book demonstrates. How about this comment on a football match from Cristiano Ronaldo, for instance: 'The reason we lost is because we didn't win.' Or Ian Wright's, 'It took a lot of bottle for Tony Adams to admit he was an alcoholic.' Or Dave Woods' remark, 'The silence is getting louder.' It makes you think, doesn't it? There are many others: 'Abstinence is the thin end of the pledge.' 'A comedian who repeats old gags is a clear case of the tale dogging the wag.' 'It is kisstomary to cuss the bride.' 'Cannabalise legalis.' A cavalcade of equally regrettable utterances form the basis of this melange of spoonerisms and spectacular ignorance. Aubrey Malone has written a bumber of nooks.

Aubrey Malone is the youngest of nine children born to Hugh Dillon-Malone, a solicitor from Ballina, a town in the West of Ireland, in 1953. In this detailed memoir he documents his father's problems with alcohol, many of which were transmitted to himself, causing feelings of depression, lack of self-esteem, and on one notable occasion, a night in jail after a drink-induced car accident. He became a teacher after graduating from college but suffered much stress and ill-health during this time. Afterwards he turned to a life of writing and this too he documents in a book which also acts as a valentine to a lost world of innocence, both in himself and an Ireland he looks back on with a mixture of nostalgia and regret.

Punctilious to a fault, Sidney Lumet favored intense rehearsal, which enabled him to bring in most of his films under budget and under schedule. An energized director who captured the heart of New York like no other, Lumet created a vast canon of work that stands as a testament to his passionate concern for justice and his great empathy for the hundreds of people with whom he collaborated during a career that spanned over five decades. This is the first full-scale biography of Lumet, a man generally regarded as one of the most affable directors of his time. Using the oral testimonies of those who worked with him both behind and in front of the camera, this book explores Lumet's personality and working methods.

Writers and alcohol have long been associated-for some, the association becomes unmanageable. Drawing on rare sources, this collection of brief biographies traces the lives of 13 well known literary drinkers, examining how their relationship with alcohol developed and how it affected their work, for better or worse. Focusing on examples like F. Scott Fitzgerald, Ernest Hemingway, Charles Bukowski and Raymond Carver, the combined biographies present a study of the classic figure of the over-indulging author.

Tired of receiving the same old advice from everyone you know? Anxious to change yourself in ways that will surprise even yourself? If so, you need to sample this riveting collection of quotes. It offers you a bevy of helpful suggestions, like...Don't moon a werewolf, Don't play leapfrog with a unicorn, and, even more importantly, Never trust anyone who, if he's alone in a room with a tea cosy, doesn't try it on. The Best Advice You'll Ever Get is a book which will change your life, moving it forward in exciting and challenging new directions. Or maybe not. Aubrey Malone has compiled a number of quotation anthologies. He would advise you to buy this one.